Tuesday, September 18, 2018

New Hope




Hello again! It's been a real long time since I actually sat down and put words to a screen. I have missed it dearly but, unfortunately I feel like I've lost it, like I don't know how to write well anymore. I wont let that stop me though, it'll only get better from here... I hope!

So here we are, September 2018. I have waited for this week to show up for a long, long time. This week is a pivotal moment for me, a moment where I face my fears and honor myself for all the times I've said "I'm so sick of this! Enough is enough!" Now, we are here and I'm so excited. I believe in this shift, in this new leaf, the energy, I believe in it so much. Maybe, for once in my life, I actually believe in myself and my abilities.


  • I am so excited to be able to finally have a schedule, a schedule that would allow me to actually plan a life around and know that unless I go elsewhere, my schedule isn't going to change.
  • I am so excited to start on the path of finally independence! At 26, it's better late than never. 
  • I am so exited to finally support and contribute towards my household. Jeff has carried us for a really long time without complaint and I could not be more blessed to have him as my life partner.
  • I am so excited to plan for a "wedding" and our honeymoon. I can't wait to officially be one bad ass team in this life. 
  • I am so excited to finally purchase a "new" vehicle without feeling guilty about it. 
  • I am so excited to feel like an active part of this household. I mean I felt like it before, but being a part-time homemaker, kind of feels a "bleh" after a while...especially without kids in the picture.
  • I am excited to better my paintings by purchasing higher end products. 
  • I am so excited to finally leave my old stories and fear behind by doing something that I always felt that I could not do. 
  • I know that is is going to a lot of fun and very empowering. I know that I will be open to learning and making new friends. I will wake up each and every day with a grateful heart and the best of intentions. 
  • I am so deserving of the opportunity to improve myself and my circumstances. 
I am so excited to finally feel excited about life and see the light at the end of the tunnel and to not feel overcome by fear. I'll write more on how I managed to put my fear aside and truly, truly live. I'm real exited to share that story.

I must say, I feel really, really good writing this. After almost 2 years of massive writers block and an overwhelming feeling of "shit, how do I do this again!?" I feel so, so elated with this entry today.

With fearless love,


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